Today, I have mostly been giving up on my dreams. Yes, sadface.


Teenagers eh? Knobs.

I never realised I was an arrogant tosser when I was a teenager. My mum told me I was, but I thought I was cool, and you know what? I bloody well was. I had a perm. Hell yes! A perm, and a mullet, and a flick, and a perm, and long hair, then longer hair, then a perm, then more and more longer hair, and perms…YES!

I wanted to be a rock god, and by the power of James Hetfield’s bollocks I was going to be one!

A rock guitarist to be more accurate. I’d got into rock at 9 with Status Quo’s 12 Gold Bars. Well, rock-ish. It didn’t take me long to get to the heavier stuff though with Iron Maiden, Twisted Sister and the like, and then with the procurement of Metallica’s Master Of Puppets at the age of 14, oh my word, yes…

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