Diary of a 3 year old smart arse – November 2013

In the last couple of weeks, our 3 year old has come out with some statements that mean we fully expect we’ll have our work cut out.  This has led me to construct a “Diary of a 3 year old smart arse”; namely errrr, a diary, which might provide limited light entertainment, but mainly be useful tool to embarrass the little turd in years to come.

She only went 3 in September, but already, is learning the art of manipulation and deceit rather well I feel.  By the way, she knows she will be getting a little sister “not long after Christmas”. She also already has a much older sister, who may, or not be, but mostly likely is, involved in the aforementioned manipulation skills. We, shall see…

Oh, so you know, the wife is expecting, we’re not waiting for Argos to get babies back in stock.  Although when they do, their 3 year accidental cover at £19.99 is pretty good.

Smart arse incident 1

3YOSA – [Watching adverts on Nick Junior] I want one of those.

Me – You have a lot of toys, you can’t have everything you see on the television.

3YOSA – [Next ad] I want one of those.

Me – I’ve just said, you can’t have everything.

3YOSA – I think my baby sister wants one of those.

And from yesterday, this little gem (not the lettuce). FYI, Chloe is her doll, she takes her everywhere. This is as we were just leaving the house.

Smart arse incident 2

3YOSA – Mum, don’t forget Chloe.

Wife – Pardon?

3YOSA – Bring Chloe.

Wife – Pardon?


Wife – PARDON?

3YOSA – Bring Chloe please.

Wife – That’s better.

3YOSA – And bring her bottle.

Wife – Pardon?

3YOSA – I don’t need it.


I’m so proud. Further diary entries may follow, depending on how bad a parent it makes me look.


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